It was a beautiful Christmas this year. It came at the end of a whirl-wind time in my life, although it has rarely been so lovely. My grandfather passed away in early November, followed by the death of a college friend. Even though the grief was softened by the assurance of heaven, it still knocks a girl down for a while. When all that was over, I felt pressure (from the Spirit and from circumstance) to make some painful church decisions before I felt ready, and so I was approaching Christmas in much the same way that I found myself approaching the throne of God: with a broken-heart and a weary spirit.
And God...in His usual way, met me right there with love. It never ceases to amaze me that all the little things in life that bring smiles and joy are like little drops of peace from Him that spread into my chest and fill me with that feeling that no matter what, He's in control, and He gives me courage to breathe, and move, and love more.
I needed that reminder that I didn't have to hold it all together. Grief is hard for me because I am a slow processor. I don't cry in what seem like the "normal" times. I grieve inwardly, and mourn silently, and because of that I often feel like I need to take care of everyone else because I'm seemingly "fine". I imagine Jesus laughs at these assumptions that He needs me to take care, needs me to hold it all together. More and more, I see that these are just ideas I have gotten from life and it's journey, and that doesn't necessarily make them all true.
Things I've learned these past few months:
1. If all we have to give is just a little bit, give it away anyway. There's enough mercy and grace from Jesus to cover the rest that we simply don't have to give, but it does us no good to hoard what we have got all to ourselves. Mother Theresa once said, I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no more hurt, only more love. There may be something to that after all.
2. Faith takes courage. Sometimes that's the courage to do the thing that will hurt us, or to do the thing that might make someone else mad. But in the end, there's more faith in taking a step than there will ever be in remaining in the same place because it seems like it might be easier. God never says that step will be full of ease and void of pain...but faith like that brings growth. And no matter what we think...we all want to grow.
3. God is enough.
Amen.
Oatmeal White Chocolate Cranberry Cookies
2/3 cup Smart Balance 50/50 (half margarine, half butter)
2/3 cup brown sugar
2 large eggs
1 1/2 cups Gluten-free Rolled Oats ( I used Bob's Red Mill brand)
1 1/2 cups Gluten-free flour ( I used Domata Living Flour)
1 tea. baking soda
1 6 ou. package of Craisins (where I found this recipe!)
1 bar Ghirardelli White Chocolate baking bar broken into chunks
Preheat oven to 375. Using an electric mixer, beat butter/margarine and sugar together in a bowl until light and fluffy. Add eggs,mixing well. Combine oats, flour, baking soda, and salt in a separate mixing bowl. Add to butter mixture in several additions, mixing well after each addition. Stir in dried cranberries and white chocolate. The recipe said to drop by rounded teaspoons and bake, but I don't know if it's because mine are GF, but I needed to roll a ball and then flatten it a bit with my fingers or a spoon for them to look like proper cookies. Bake 12 minutes until golden brown and then move to a wire rack.
Enjoy, and remember to share the Love!
And God...in His usual way, met me right there with love. It never ceases to amaze me that all the little things in life that bring smiles and joy are like little drops of peace from Him that spread into my chest and fill me with that feeling that no matter what, He's in control, and He gives me courage to breathe, and move, and love more.
 |
| Christmas is...loving family. These are my adorable cousins Brayden & Caleb. |
I needed that reminder that I didn't have to hold it all together. Grief is hard for me because I am a slow processor. I don't cry in what seem like the "normal" times. I grieve inwardly, and mourn silently, and because of that I often feel like I need to take care of everyone else because I'm seemingly "fine". I imagine Jesus laughs at these assumptions that He needs me to take care, needs me to hold it all together. More and more, I see that these are just ideas I have gotten from life and it's journey, and that doesn't necessarily make them all true.
 |
| Beautiful Christmas Moments = Watching my nephews enjoy their first Christmas ever! In the background is my Mom, Dad, and big brother (their Dad). *love* |
Things I've learned these past few months:
1. If all we have to give is just a little bit, give it away anyway. There's enough mercy and grace from Jesus to cover the rest that we simply don't have to give, but it does us no good to hoard what we have got all to ourselves. Mother Theresa once said, I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no more hurt, only more love. There may be something to that after all.
2. Faith takes courage. Sometimes that's the courage to do the thing that will hurt us, or to do the thing that might make someone else mad. But in the end, there's more faith in taking a step than there will ever be in remaining in the same place because it seems like it might be easier. God never says that step will be full of ease and void of pain...but faith like that brings growth. And no matter what we think...we all want to grow.
3. God is enough.
Amen.
 | ||
| Christmas is...enjoying simple treats & sharing them too! |
Oatmeal White Chocolate Cranberry Cookies
2/3 cup Smart Balance 50/50 (half margarine, half butter)
2/3 cup brown sugar
2 large eggs
1 1/2 cups Gluten-free Rolled Oats ( I used Bob's Red Mill brand)
1 1/2 cups Gluten-free flour ( I used Domata Living Flour)
1 tea. baking soda
1 6 ou. package of Craisins (where I found this recipe!)
1 bar Ghirardelli White Chocolate baking bar broken into chunks
Preheat oven to 375. Using an electric mixer, beat butter/margarine and sugar together in a bowl until light and fluffy. Add eggs,mixing well. Combine oats, flour, baking soda, and salt in a separate mixing bowl. Add to butter mixture in several additions, mixing well after each addition. Stir in dried cranberries and white chocolate. The recipe said to drop by rounded teaspoons and bake, but I don't know if it's because mine are GF, but I needed to roll a ball and then flatten it a bit with my fingers or a spoon for them to look like proper cookies. Bake 12 minutes until golden brown and then move to a wire rack.
Enjoy, and remember to share the Love!
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